“This happens when salespeople focus on their own needs first, and people find that annoying. In sales, that is inexcusable. One thing we find helpful is to get people to meet another person’s needs before meeting their own. When you focus on the other person first, you honor the sequence of understanding before seeking to be understood.  It helps you become more open. The law of reciprocity takes hold, and the people whose needs you helped meet will help you get what you want.”

　　Ultimately, sales are directed conversations, and if you try to dominate that conversation you will turn your customers off. Being pushy is a product of not understanding what the true goal of sales should be: creating value. Helping to meet your customers’ needs first will help you to see how the conversation should function, and will help you come off as being less pushy.

　　“Sales people often only think of themselves. With a selfish focus, you lose the ability to empathize. If you can empathize, you come closer to seeing things the way others see them. Another reason they don’t take “no” for an answer is because they’re not prepared. In a sale, you’re looking at the value of something. Without adequate preparation beforehand, it’s difficult to understand what the customer really needs.  Without that, it’s almost impossible to sell value. A lack of empathy and preparation combine to create a situation where you can’t see the customers’ point of view and fail to get cooperation.  The result is they keep pushing even when “no” is the answer.

　　A salesperson can alleviate this issue through several practices. First, you need to think about why the customer would purchase your product. Empathize with their situation – in other words, try to understand their needs. Next, work to prepare yourself to know the true value of the product. Preparation will help you not only come off as a more professional and competent sales person, but will also help you form a stronger first sales pitch, which could reduce the rate of rejection in the first place. Finally, think of sales as a normal human interaction. Too often, sales people think about how they’re trying to talk at a customer, rather than creating a conversation. If you can create an environment where you’re just two people having a conversation, everyone would act more natural, and you wouldn’t come off as being aggressive. A friendlier environment will help you complete the sale.

　　“Rookie salespeople don’t listen. They talk with the intent to convince, rather than talk with the intent to explore or understand. The human dynamic is very predictable – when someone is talking at you (or down to you, even worse), what is your natural tendency? Are you more likely to open up and share information?  Or are you likely to close down meaningful dialogue?  When salespeople come off as condescending or offensive, customers tend to become defensive and annoyed.”